The Vamps: Can We Dance

Take a bunch of good-looking One Direction types, scuff their hair up a little, give them guitars (bury them in the mix, though – this isn’t punk) and add a naughty word to the chorus of their debut single, and bam: two million YouTube views in a fortnight, a #2 single in the UK, a Twitter-happy fanbase, and support slots lined up with the likes of Selena Gomez and Taylor Swift.

Can We Dance is the perfect gateway drug for tweens who are quickly outgrowing the manufactured air of One Direction, but not yet ready to swing across to The Arctic Monkeys, The Vaccines or any of the numerous other indie-pop lad bands with guitars. Of course, the record label’s fingerprints are all over this track: writing credits are split between five people, one of whom is Bruno Mars, and none of whom are in the band. I doubt if the group played a note of the tightly-wound backing track, either. This all matters little to The Vamps’ target market: the single is hooky as hell, with a winding, earworm of a chorus, and subject matter that somewhat glorifies drinking and spontaneous romantic encounters (but mum, you listened to worse stuff when you were a kid).

The Vamps’ debut single is an unqualified home-run, and although they’ll disown it in a few years, then embrace it again in twenty, right now, The Vamps are set to be the biggest thing since… are McFly still kicking?